Can you ever have too much moderation? Is it possible to too many time-saving devices that actually deceive us into thinking we have more time to give to less important things? Are you as easily distracted as I am? Is it possible for moderation itself to become a distraction?
In response to a previous post on this topic I received a comment that was loaded with far more wisdom than the post itself. I asked the commenter Gretchen McKinney for permission to share. It is so wonderfully authentic and I hope that it resonates with you as it did with me. Gretchen writes….
Ok Kirk, you have no idea how much this resonated with me. I am a mom of 4, ages 17, 10, 4 and 19 months and as if it is not busy enough with 4 goobers then you the “everything else” and because of the “everything else” I feel I live a very distracted life. I attempt to do everything with meaning and purpose but I often fail because of this distracted life of mine and I KNOW that I SHOULD be doing more because as parents we have A LOT to show and do with our kids.
I was told recently by a long time co-worker who is a LCSW that our 2 older kids are REALLY good kids (he likes the little ones too but obviously can’t gage them like the 2 older ones). He told me he sees the good and bad everyday and wanted me to know that we are doing something right because he said they are true, genuine, good kids. I cried…heck I bawled. Because I often feel like a failure and he KNOWS that…so then I thought WOW, maybe we are doing good and right by them. BUT then I immediately thought, I wonder if the 2 littles ones are going to be as good. I think this because in today’s society the priorities are so different then they were even 5 years ago. I have so many more distractions than I did even 5 years ago. We depend on technology, social media, etc. I had a cell phone that I had for 7 years and everyone made fun of me because it was almost as big as a bag phone…it still worked and I didn’t need a data package despite it being a “smartphone” so in January I caved and bought an iPhone. I feel this was one of my worst mistakes this year…I have lived 37 years without data why do I need it now? It adds in another distraction and these distractions continue to pile up…thus contributing to a busy life but not always a meaningful one.
LIVING A LESS DISTRACTING LIFE
So in wrapping up “my ramblings” we started about a month ago making some positive changes to live a less distracted life: 1) I got rid of facebook…I realize everything is good in moderation however how many “moderations” can we fit in before they all become distractions. 2) I turn off my cell phone between the hours of 10am and 2 pm so I only focus on my little ones. 3) I do NOT check my phone with my family in tow. 4) No technology on school nights for the kids. NONE! I thought these changes would be tough and be met with much resistance however it was not as tought as I thought, and the results have been INCREDIBLE! We can all hopefully relate to the memory of a nice dinner with some enjoyable conversation. But since turning off technology our whole night, not just during dinner, is now like 1 VERY long dinner conversation. I hear “momma” so much more but man, is that music to my ears.
I am a mom that wants to enjoy these years and focus on the things that matter the most because I remember like it was yesterday that our 17-year-old was our 18 month old. Kirk I wish you and your readers a great weekend…
- This is a great post…. It brought tears to my eyes. http://www.handsfreemama.com/2012/05/07/how-to-miss-a-childhood/
( I WENT AND READ THIS POST… it was very good! Thank you Gretchen for sharing with us)
“Most of us will miss the real significance of what we might experience from this life, and what we might contribute to this life, not because we are bad people doing bad things, but because we have allowed ourselves to become distracted from doing the most important ones.”
We all know it can be hard work to stay focused on the most important things… but we also know staying focused on those things may be the most important work we will ever do. ~ Kirk Weisler